What do you want to do today?
This is a question many of us forget to ask. Or we’ve never imagined that we could, that it might be useful.
For most of my adult life, one of the first things I’d look at, after waking up, was my to-do list. The endless catalogue of obligations, of things I ought, should, must do that day.
No wonder everything felt like a chore.
We chose creative work.
Many of us are self-employed. We built our lives for freedom, yet we don’t allow ourselves to take it.
We feel the need to replicate 9-5 hours, even though many of us often need to work outside of those hours, too.
Worst of all, we ignore the side-quests, the impractical creative ideas, those urges to make something we want to make, even though we’re not sure if we’ll ever get paid for it.
Recently I’ve made a shift.
I start the day by asking what I’d love to do, then I build my day around that as much as possible.
If I can’t, I make sure I steal some spaces and get at least a taste of what I want. Even on a busy day with lots of fixed appointments, I can often find a sliver of time, if I really want to.
Partly, this is about me thinking about what work will look like, as I get older. I still enjoy it and want to do it, but more and more, I also want more time and space for other things.
What surprised me is how productive this shift has been, how much I actually get done when I replace obligation with desire.
We’re conditioned to be suspicious of joy.
And to be clear, doing what you want doesn’t mean you won’t also feed your children, walk your dog, call your elderly parent, pay the bills, clean up after yourself, deliver commissions on time, earn some money.
But it does take the weight out of these things, that sense of shouldering a heavy burden and staggering uphill with it, day after day. Instead, you might start to find them satisfying, fulfilling, even fun. To remember that at some point you chose these things, and that you want them in your life.
Certainly for me, writing has once more become something I want to do, that I feel lucky I get to do, rather than something I have to do. So I don’t try to avoid it, or do it out of a grim sense of duty. Even on days when it’s hard.
What does this look like in reality?
Yesterday the sun was finally shining after what seems like an eternity of wet, grey days. So after my writing hour (which is sacred time for me, and non-negotiable), I went for a long walk then spent a pleasant hour doing some work in the garden before dealing with email and admin.
I had two coaching appointments in the afternoon, and after those I realised that I felt energised from the morning and still had enough focus to get something substantial done. So before dinner, I updated my accounts, paid bills, and did all the household financial admin.
Did I want to do this? Not particularly. But I knew it would feel good to have it done, that it would make the rest of the week better.
Afterwards, I flopped on the sofa and watched a film, feeling it had been a good, productive day. There was no temptation to do just one more thing, no guilt about the tasks remaining on my list. I’d done enough.
So my challenge to you.
For the next 30 days, choose joy. Ask yourself what you want to do. And do it, every day.
Then check in with yourself, see what else you have the capacity to do.
Questions I find useful for this:
- What will move things forward?
- What will make everything else easier?
- What will feel really good to have finished?
- Is there a way to make this fun ?
If it feels terrifying to let go of discipline, structure and your long list of tasks, can you try this one working day a week? Then perhaps expand to two?
Trust yourself.
If you want to stay in bed till lunch-time, go with it, if you can. If not, get an early night because you’re probably tired.
If you find yourself wanting to read, stare into space, doodle, tidy up your workspace, go to the cinema in the afternoon.. perhaps you need that. So try it, guilt-free. And see what happens.
(But if you find yourself endlessly scrolling, it might be worth asking if you’re really doing what you want to do. Or if you’re doing what the tech billionaires want you to do..)
It will feel weird at first.
If you’ve spent most of your life controlled by your task list and drowning in a sea of obligations, it will take a while to uncover what you want. To even hear it, let alone trust it.
But give it some time. You might surprise yourself by suddenly being more inspired and productive than you’ve been in months. And doing the work willingly, joyfully.
Which is what a juicy, creative life should feel like, no?
PS
When you look up joy in any photo library, you get pictures like the one above. Living by the sea gives me a lot of pleasure. But I have never once jumped for joy, even during my many years of dancing all night. And now, it would kill my knees.
But hey, if standing in a high place with your arms outstretched makes you happy, or if you’ve always dreamed of running through a field with a bunch of balloons or a long piece of fabric trailing behind you – go for it!
What do you think?