How to create your ideal life

This exercise is all about your vision, about getting clear on what you want, and why. It’s a key foundation because without it, we can get all the success we’ve ever dreamed of and still be desperately unhappy.

But if you know what you want and where you’re going, there’s no reason at all not to enjoy at least some of that now. 

So what are you working for?

Most of us work because we have to. We need to put food on the table, a roof over our heads, to support our families. But that won’t get you jumping out of bed in the morning, excited to start your day.

You might think it’s all about the money, and of course it is. But once you’ve paid the bills, ask yourself what that money is actually for.

• Will it give you security, freedom, a fabulous wardrobe, the ability to travel? 
• Will you use some of it to support causes dear to you? 
• Are you saving to buy a home, a car, or something special?
• Perhaps this last decade or so of work make the difference between a retirement that will be comfortable and fun, or just getting by? 

Keep honing this until it’s clear what you ultimately want. 

Perhaps it’s freedom: to choose your own hours, to fit work around your family or other interests, to travel, to choose what projects you work on. Or the satisfaction of doing great work, the fun of rising to new creative challenges, or expressing yourself fully. Or perhaps it’s all about connection, collaboration, being part of a team? Is it status, recognition, even fame? Or simply to be the best in your chosen field? 

It’s good to keep this in mind, to remind yourself occasionally what you’re working for, and why. 

You can only stay on track if you know where you’re heading. 

There’s no point working for yourself because freedom is all-important, then committing long-term to 14-hour days, seven days a week. But if a few months of hard work will buy you a camper van and give you the freedom to go where you want, when you want – that might be something you can do with a smile on your face, because you’re clear on your why.

Now imagine your ideal life.

Using a journal can really help with this. Give yourself an hour or two to think about the life you’d really love, if everything goes right for you. 

Write it all down, in as much detail as possible. You might also want to create a vision board, with pictures representing the future you want to create.

Right now, you may be struggling to get your business off the ground and earn a living from your work. But don’t let this stop you dreaming big. 

Who are the top people in your field, or the people you really respect? How would you choose to live if you reached their position? What would you do with your days, if money was not an issue for you? 

Really take time to imagine this life in detail.

• Where are you living? In what kind of home? How is it furnished? 
• Who do you hang out with? How do you spend your days? What do your evenings and weekends look like?
• What projects are you working on? What are you creating? 
• How many hours or days a week do you work? What do you do the rest of the time? 
• How do you stay fit and well?
• How are you learning and growing? 
• What difference are you making: to yourself, your loved ones, your community, the planet?

Over the next few days, focus deeply on this vision. 

Analyse what you really want, deep down. You might realise that at least some of the things you imagined are available to you now, in some form. 

People often envisage enjoying dinners with friends, long walks in the countryside, eating well and exercising regularly, spending quality time with family. But we don’t have to wait until we’re wealthy or successful to do such things. We just have to prioritise them.

If your dreams seem out of reach, get creative.

You might not immediately be able to buy the beach house you imagined in your ideal life. But you could perhaps go to the coast for a day or a weekend – or do a house swap for a few weeks. 

One of my clients dreamed of writing on a sunny balcony overlooking the sea, then roaming the beach in the mornings and evenings with the dog she’d always wanted. After some creative thinking she joined a pet-sitting site, and ended up working on her novel in California for three months, looking after a sea-view house and two gorgeous dogs while their owners were away.

Make time now, for the things you want.

One of the great joys of being our own boss is that we have control of our time. One of the big downsides is that we work for a harsh taskmaster. Sometimes, you need to ease up: give yourself a day off, a chance to play, at least a taste of what you’re working so hard to achieve. 

It’s great be clear about where you are going, and what your goals are. But it’s even more important to enjoy the journey.